Thursday, February 28, 2013

5 Strengths and Weaknesses

While I am trying to be honest, I wanted to avoid this item on the 30 things my kids should know about me list. Describe 5 strengths and weaknesses you have. I know that I have weaknesses but I like to either think of them as things I am working on or not at all. However, after reading Courtney Palmer's blog yesterday, I decided to tackle this question/task. Seeing as I want to end on a positive note, I will start with my weaknesses.


1. My self confidence. I can honestly say that in the past four years of my life, this has improved. However, I still feel that it is lacking. I went from one abusive situation to another and used to believe my self worth to be next to nothing. I was told that school was a waste of my time, that dreaming of signing on a big stage was a waste of time, and that I wasn't good enough. I was constantly torn down with any little bit of success I saw. I was an emotional eater due to being cheated on, lied to, and abused. I felt alone no matter what I was doing. I finally read one of the most amazing books (It's Called a Break-up because it's Broken) and got in a relationship with one of the most amazing men I knew. This book taught me how to move on in 30 days (or less, I think it was more like 15) from the train wreck of a life I was trying to preserve. The person I saw in the mirror was finally becoming who I wanted it to be. I am still working on it, but I have made huge strides in the past few years.

2. Procrastination. I am a huge procrastinator. I have talked and blogged and tweeted about this so many times. I like to waste a lot of time and finish things while being pressured. Last night for example, I had a 1000 word paper, an evolution of law journal entry, a case study, a critical thinking log, part of my group project, and 6 discussion posts due tonight at midnight. You would think that I would have started this yesterday when I had next to no homework, but the procrastinator in me waited until 9pm, 3 hours before everything was due, to even start.

3. Anger. I like to think that I am super passionate and everything effects me greatly. However, I get angry easily. This temper runs in my family, but I know that controlling it is my own doing. I get angry fast. This has escalated since I have gotten pregnant because I have next to no patience. I don't get angry with my kids, but my poor husband is another story. While he blames it on the "crazy pregnancy hormones" (usually because it is something very simple to fix and I cry after yelling), I know that only accounts for some of it. I have tried writing, which has helped me in the past, but I usually don't have time for it.

4. My relationship with God. I know that God is supposed to take priority in my life, but I have yet to allow Him to do this. I have complete faith in the fact that he is guiding me down the right path and His hands are always upon me, I feel that I do not show as much interest as He has. He has blessed me with the 2 (soon to be 3) most gorgeous and amazing children in the world. Their love for me and my love for them could not even begin to put into words. He has also blessed me with my perfect match and the one man I have loved. Who would have thought that when you aren't looking, you find the one person you are meant to share your entire life with. He blessed me with a man who is devoted to me completely and who I love with everything I have. However, I can't even spend an hour in church or reading my Bible. I am working on this by living a life God would be proud of, but I feel He deserves more and I haven't given it to Him.

5. I try to fix everything. I think that I can fix people or their situations. I am constantly wanting to heal people's pain. I feel that I have gone through a lot and can add insight. However, more times than not, I am not the person to be fixing things. I want everyone to be happy and live life to the fullest, but sometimes people just have to fight their own battles and find their own way. I know most people would not see this as a weakness, but I do. I find myself tying up a lot of my time trying to counsel people without knowing their whole story and trying to offer insight to solutions that I have no idea if that is the best solution for them. While my intentions are good, I sometimes just need to mind my own business.

Ok. Enough with the weaknesses. Let's get to more positive things.


1. Multitasker. This is something that I do so well. I take on so much but it helps me. I need to be busy. I need to be doing something. I need to be doing a lot of somethings. When people who know me well find out that I am a stay at home mom, they are surprise because I have always been someone who works a ton or whose schedule is always busy. Then I talk about all I do; currently enrolled in 20 credit hours of school, caring for 3 toddlers (2 of my own and 1 extra), pregnant with my 3rd baby, blogger, and running a business online. My days are packed to the brim, which is exactly how I like it.

2. Motherhood. I feel that motherhood has been one of the greatest blessings in my life. I used to say that I never wanted kids because I couldn't handle watching other people's kids. Now I am pregnant with my 3rd and I have a 1 and 2 year old. I feel that this is something I was meant to do. I am completely devoted to caring for my children and have been complimented numerous times on how well of a job I do. This isn't me bragging, but it's something I feel is one of my greatest strengths. My children come before anything else in my life. I take on so much at school so I can get done faster in order to provide them with everything they ever want (yes I like to spoil my kids, but they are not brats by any means). They are super well adjusted kids who are extremely intelligent. My son knows all of his letters, not as in he knows the alphabet, but that he can name any letter you show him (struggles with W) and he is only 2 and a half. My daughter can bring me things that I specifically ask for (like bring me the blue cup when there is a pink one right there too).

3. School. I am not one of the smartest people in the world or anything, but school comes naturally for me. I have been on the Dean's list 3 out of my 4 semesters in school. And the one that I didn't make Dean's list, I made President's list. I took advanced placement courses in high school and Spanish independent study. I graduated high school with a 3.87 GPA. I can figure out anything that is handed to me. My parents save all of their stuff that needs assembling or fixing or whatever for me.

4. Marriage. Whoever says marriage isn't work, lies. It requires commitment, compromise, and forgiveness. I feel that I have become great at sharing my feelings (even if it means I am overly expressive) which is helpful in making improvements. My husband and I are perfect for one another. We work so well together, but we work together. Our marriage was built on a solid ground of trust, love, and faith. We have built our marriage around this, which has provided a stable life for our children. We are in love beyond words can express and continue to build our commitment to one another as well as our love for each other.

5. Math/numbers. I know this isn't as deep as the others and should be included in the school field, but math is my best subject. It always has been. I took college calculus in high school for God's sake. I have been able to catch on to math fairly easily. I have found that working with numbers is something I am good at. I have memorized my social security number (not super impressive), my driver's license number, my husband's social security number, our debit card number, any phone number I have ever had, and can memorize quite a few numbers in my short term memory for simple things. I think this is why my husband puts my in charge of our bills. He isn't that great at remembering things.

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